I remember when I was teaching in Minnesota, I had an 8th grader named, Ashley. She was a girl who would dress all in black – down to her eyeliner and nail polish. If I would have met her when I was in middle school, I would have been completely intimidated by her. Ashley came off as one of the most confident and self-assured girls in all of eighth grade.
Once I got to know her a bit, I found out that her parents were recently divorced. One Monday, she shared that she had been at her dad’s house that weekend. We got into a discussion about how she would switch off between her mom’s and dad’s and she said something that I haven’t forgotten in over 20 years – She liked going to her dad’s better because there were rules at his house…
Being a relatively young woman, (all of about 21 at the time…), not long out of my parents’ house, I remember being surprised by that. In fact, I was kind of blown away at that. I had come from a household with both parents, and it seemed like every time I wanted to do something there was a rule about it. But, now, looking back as a more mature (ahem) woman – and a mom – I think I understand a little better.
Why set rules as a parent?
Ashley’s dad set out clear expectations. These helped her know how she should behave and what she should – and shouldn’t – do. These rules showed Ashley that he loved her and cared about her and what happened to her. He placed limitations on her activities in order to keep her safe.
The rules made Ashley’s time at her dad’s house that much easier! Because Ashley’s dad gave her limits and guidelines, she knew exactly what was expected of her. Not only that, his rules were consistent. There was no guessing and trying to figure everything out. She just knew what to do – and that, alone, is very comforting.
Now, as a parent, I completely understand the need for rules. (Maybe I really do need to thank my parents for all of theirs…) Not only do they help keep your child safe, they help form their moral compass and set the boundaries they so desperately desire – even if they would never admit it…
What about our Father’s rules?
So, then I started thinking about God’s rules – and what they tell us about Him as a parent.
When Jesus was asked about what commandment is greatest, he replied,
Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. Matthew 22:37
The second is, “Love your neighbor as yourself. (v. 39) This, to me, goes well with the Golden Rule,
So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets. Matthew 7:12
Or, how I learned it, Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
If God’s top two commandments are about loving Him and loving and caring for your neighbor, then that makes it very clear to me. Our Father is a loving and caring God. Now, just like any papa, he will not be happy with me if I disobey Him, but I know His rules are there because He loves me.
The next widely known set of rules are the 10 Commandments in Exodus 20:1-17. (Be sure to look those up and read through them again.) These are our Father’s way of setting very clear expectations as to how he wants us to live. Just like Ashley, we know the rules are consistent and there doesn’t need to be any guessing. We know exactly what to do.
Rules to Live By
So, in the end, do I think Ashley really was that self-assured and confident girl she tried to portray? Nope. In reality, she was a fourteen-year-old girl who so desperately needed her father’s guidance. I am definitely not 14 anymore (thank goodness…), but I still need God’s rules and guidance every day. And that’s why I continue to have my morning quiet times and read my bible.
It’s not always easy, and I often times fail. But then I think about why God gave us these rules in the first place – He loves us. He wants us to be good people and to love Him and our neighbors. Just like any parent, He wants us to be safe and loved. He’s given us the ultimate set of rules with the ultimate reward. He wants us to follow His rules so we can be with Him in heaven. Again, not always easy, and with many fails along the way. But, I find great comfort in knowing what is expected of me and working hard to please my Father.
Your Thoughts
So, what do you think? What other rules or guidelines have you found that have given you insight into our Father? I know – I have chosen a few that are very familiar, and there are so many others in the bible! I would love to hear the ones that first come to your mind. Thanks for sharing!
