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Gratitude – Normal or Not…

A few days ago, I went grocery shopping.  Not seemingly a monumental occasion.  But for someone who hasn’t been able to go for months, it was a pretty big deal!

After I came home, I shared with Brad how awesome it was just to be in a store.  Just to wander through the aisles and browse through all the choices…  I wanted to buy everything I saw and stock up our pantry.

Thankfully, I maintained some self-control and didn’t drain the bank account – but I sure could have…

That small trip to the grocery store was something that resembled my life before my back problems.  It was a life in which I accomplished tasks and felt productive.  A life that felt easy and comfortable.  It has been so long since I have had those feelings – so long since I have been able to do the normal things I used to take for granted.

My goal is to never do that again.

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Without God, we are all helpless
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Helpless on our own

Yesterday was a bit rough around our house. It started as a great day. Brad was off due to the Martin Luther King, Jr. holiday, and we had fun things planned – a birthday lunch, some errands, and just spending time together, (imagine ~ a conversation without kids…). It was going to be so wonderful and relaxing!

But first, the driveway needed to be shoveled.

I heard him call my name from outside. Instantly, alarm bells went off in my head. I ‘ran’ as fast as I could to the door and looked out to see him lying at the bottom of our sloped driveway.

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Who determines this answer - The World or God?
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I should be…

Should?

So many times I think I would like to be the creative type. You know this person. The one who can MacGyver a piece of twine, a few berries, and a candle into the most beautiful holiday tablescape you can imagine. Sometimes I can pull something off, but let’s just say I’ll never have my own Etsy shop…

Yet, every time I see a post about someone’s craft store or a new little creation that somebody made, I feel this pull. Like, I should be able to do that, right? Or, maybe if I worked a lot harder I could get that skill?

When I was younger, I would have said, ‘Absolutely!’ But, now that I am a little older, (and hopefully a bit wiser), I now realize that I don’t think that’s how God made me.

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Silence Resolved

Silence

For more months than I would like to admit, that’s what God heard from me. Not complete silence, but compared to how I had been communicating with Him before, I’m thinking He noticed. I know I did.

In the beginning of December, I had back surgery. It was one of those things that was inevitable at some point. And, I had tried every single conservative option – at least once. So, when I was offered the date of December 8th, I figured I could hide my very fashionable back brace (a requirement until March 8 – but who’s counting?) under sweaters, I took it.

If you look back at the posts on this blog, you’ll notice that the last time I posted was on The Birthday of our Baptism. Yep. That was in October. It has been 85 days since I wrote anything. 85 days!

Granted, over the last month I have been recovering from a pretty major surgery – and, celebrating one of the best Christmases I have EVER had – but that still leaves about 55.  And even that is a big number.  I’m having a hard time getting past it…

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Baptism
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The Birthday of our Baptism

Today makes one year.

One year following the conclusion of my preliminary studies of the Bible.  You know — the ones that made me realize I had a lot more studying to do.

12 months since I wrote my letter to God – telling Him why I wanted to be baptized.

365 days since I publicly declared, “Jesus is Lord.”

Today is Brad’s and my Spiritual Birthday – or Birthday of our Baptism…

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